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Embarassing
Moment 2
15 MAY 07
Oh,
you all made fun of me with my temperature-mouth-gaping -story ah..
Ok, I have one more embarrassing story to tell you and you better
keep this one a secret also. Promise don’t laugh ah, if not
I don’t want to friend you anymore! :P I
must let you guys know that I have an overactive mind. Seriously.
My mind will always go on overdrive whenever I am alone. Images,
people, events, movies, music, impure thoughts, everything will
dump itself like one bad, abandoned, garbage center. Images of
an action sequence from Batman, or toying with a new cartoon idea,
contemplating how I can kill the guy that pissed me off last week
without leaving fingerprints.. It’s a circus inside the
mind of the Evil Bunny and trust me you don’t want to go
there. So I must admit that I am seldom bored.. Who needs a PSP
when your mind is like a freaking 24 hours movie channel.. but
on the downside… the remote control is broken. I can’t
choose what I wanna see nor can I stop it. |
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He's
puking blood not food. |
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| Once
I am deep in this trance state of mind, I will act differently.
I can still look at you in the eyes but I don’t actually SEE
you; I see Yogi Bear in Yellowstone Park. I can still hear words
but they are just white noise to me. So the next time you asked
me a question and I just nod.. I’m deep in Happee Land.. so
sorry about that. I hope you understand how severe this day dreaming
thing is. So
one day, I was riding on the MRT and I sat on the seat that is
close to the door… not the couple seat.. the one across
it. Since I am alone, my mind start to dump its bull crap slowly…
it started with images of little kittens then progressed to a
scene from Phua Chu Kang, then it started to degenerate to images
of naked girls then I’ll feel guilty and I’ll remember
a sermon I heard online… and slowly my mind will wander
to Teen Titans.. as you can see it’s working fulltime. You
can see me smiling and frowning.. subtle enough to notice but
not enough for you to label me as being crazy :P
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So
a lady came in and practically everybody was looking at her and
me. I thought nothing of it and I couldn’t comprehend what
was going. My mind was already playing reruns of Shaolin Soccer
so I ignored their stares.. Then seconds turned to minutes. The
crowd were still looking at me and the woman. I smiled because
my mind is playing a nursery rhyme. Then a guy gave his seat to
her. Then the lady screamed the loudest “Thank You”
I’ve heard in my whole life riding on the MRT.
I was kinda shocked and amused because I don’t know what
the big “Thank You” is for.. maybe she is a naturally
appreciative person or maybe she’s just weird that way.
Oh well, Jessica Alba is doing a strip tease and I’m not
in the mood to make fun of someone with a speech impediment. |
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Then
after some minutes, and when my mind was busy flipping channels,
I took another look at the lady and I realized that she got a
huge 8 ½ mths-ready-to-burst kinda belly. The Starhub cable
tv in my head suddenly switched off and I smack my forehead hard..
Aiyah no wonderlah. I was sitting on the maternity seat and the
loud “Thank You” was meant to make me paiseh! It makes
so much sense now…
But
wait, that’s not the embarrassing story I wanna tell you
guys. This one is.. Ok, you all know that I owned a motorbike
once, right? That imitation R1-FZR mix breed, I don’t
know what to call it. After several years of going home, taking
the same route; the routine kinda get ingrained in your brain.
So once I ditched my motorbike, (cause it gave me problems),
I decided to get a bicycle instead. Now I can ride to the nearby
parks and everything was peachy. I usually like to ride on the
side of the street and not on pavements because pedestrians
can be a major hazards for a cyclist. I did not install a bell
because I think they are gay. I did have a tiny side mirror
because it made my cheap mountain bicycle looked like a professional..
Yup, the ones Lance Armstrong would use. So…
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My mountain
bike. |
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| One
fine bloody day, after hours and hours riding my bicycle round and
round the Neighborhood Park, I decided to go home. I rode on the
side of the street and I used the same exact routine when I had
my Motorbike.. Everything clear so far? Good. Then
my overactive mind crept on me again and clouded my brain with
an episode from the Smurfs.. the rare episode where Papa Smurf
realized he has a stubby blue tail.. Oh well, enough about that.
Check this out; I cycled my mountain bike uphill, went over the
road humps and cycled into the public carpark. Then I CONVIENIETLY
PARKED MY BICYCLE AT THE MOTOR BIKE PARKING LOT… kwa kwa
kwa…..
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Thinking
about this.... |
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... will lead to this. I seriously gotta watch less cartoons man. |
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What
weird thing was, even when I was reversing my bicycle, I thought
I was riding a motorbike.. Damn.. I was in my early 20s and I’m
already going senile! Screw you Papa Smurf and your stupid stubby
tail! I left the bicycle parked amongst the Vespas and Yamahas
and approached the lift and only after minutes, that I realized
what I’ve done! I rushed back and paisehly push my bicycle
to the voiddeck.. Heng, nobody see.. I think.
Senile
at 24,
Evil Bunny
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